The previous month presented me with a lot of challenges. As I said earlier, Tim was gone so I found myself trying to make plans and stay relatively busy. I did just that. While I can’t say it was easy, I can’t say that I allowed myself to be miserable either.
What I didn’t mention in my first post was it was very difficult for us to talk as well. So not only was he away but he couldn’t chat either.
One thing people have said to me several times is “you chose this life”. Not only do I find that a little bit rude but it also doesn’t make it any easier. Distance relationships for anyone are not fun. I don’t think anyone ever says “a perfect relationship for me is someone who lives far away or is gone frequently”. I also tried my best not to whine on the internet but honestly I didn’t find myself completely miserable that I felt the need to do that. Yes some days were extremely hard, but some days I was so busy or gone all day with work by the time I got home I fell asleep.
Something both Tim and I have strived on is having a life outside of each other. We love each other but we both strongly believe it’s important to have other hobbies that aren’t the same. Tim fixes cars, I like to hang out with my friends…etc. Honestly I think everyone needs their own hobbies too.
While he was away, I…
I’ve made plans that have kept me busy.
I’ve seen friends I haven’t gotten to see in a while.
I took time for me.
The important thing for me personally was to stay busy. Whether staying busy meant going out to eat with friends, talking with relatives, or just hanging out…I needed to stay busy. If I allowed myself to be bored, then I began to be miserable.
I can’t say that I wasn’t overzealous and excited to finally go pick him up though. It was a long month.
Since this is somewhat relevant, I’ve gotten a lot of questions about how wedding planning is going. Neither of us don’t have any ties to NJ, so we aren’t planning a wedding here. This week when we go down to VA Beach, we have a couple of wedding venue appointments. I am hoping to find the “perfect” venue and have that set in stone. Then I can begin to start wedding talk and go look for a dress…and all the other things you do.
Past that, I haven’t done a lot. We aren’t getting married anytime soon (sometime in the late Spring 2015) and are taking time to relax and enjoy the moment. I ordered a wedding planner notebook that I’ll be sharing in a couple of days. I’ve enjoyed their normal planners for college so I thought I would probably enjoy their wedding planners too. Plus they offered to do a giveaway. It’s a product I used throughout college and loved so hopefully you will too.
I read a lot of wedding blogs and hear from friends that planned their wedding in a month. I had respect for you before but I now have a new found respect. I cannot even imagine planning a wedding in 4 months.
Questions for you:
What is one of your hobbies?
If you are married, how long were engaged for?