Let’s face it…when you are in a community of runners, a lot of your friends are runners. It’s an unavoidable fact.
Runners do the same things.
They geek out to the same new things. (OMG new Asics shoe next month!?)
Runners have the same internet searches…
How to run
How to run faster
How to run faster and PR
Anyways, as runners we are friends with more runners. It’s also why we display bumper stickers on the back of our cars. It’s like the bat signal to others of “hey, let’s be friends because I’m a runner too!”.
Here are five types of running friends you have (or if you don’t, the chances are you are that person).
The Injury Connoisseur
Bless this poor runner’s heart, your friend has had every injury known to runner kind.
Maybe they poorly train or are just extremely injury prone, this poor person always seems to be injured…That being said, if you have any ache or pain from your metatarsal to your ear lobe…you can count on them to know what your problem is. While they didn’t go to medical school, they still could tell you the symptoms and recovery process to every injury imaginable.
Push the Pace Pat
PTPP runs all of his training runs at the exact same pace he races. If you are looking for a free speed workout, Pat is your guy. He is probably slightly awkward to run with because you can’t chat since you are sprinting the entire time. You wonder how he doesn’t get injured but realize he doesn’t improve either. He doesn’t mind his consistent speed…he just likes his exact 7:02 pace every single mile of every single run. No faster, no slower. His secondary titles are Consistency Cal or Racing Raymond.
New Garmin out? Tim knows.
New Fitbit heart rate tracking monitor doodad thingy? Tim knows.
New cross training machine out? LOLZ, Tim has known for the last few months.
If you have any technology questions or products, Tim will provide you with the answer. Just don’t go on a long run with him or you might fall asleep while he geeks out to some formula that causes the Fitbit to calibrate to your steps.
Unice will run 30 miles just because. 30 miles today, tomorrow and possibly 30 miles every day. Unice lives for the long run and lives for running on the trails. Your friend Unice can take you to the best state parks with the best scenery.
Be careful though because they might be gorgeous state parks with hidden intense trails. A 30 miler is hard enough but adding a 1000 feet climb every few miles increases the difficulty…The male version (Long Run Logan) normally has a long beard because face it…when do ultra-marathoners not have beards?
Hungover Harry is the life of the party and the life of the run. He is always open to running whether he just got done drinking a few hours ago or not. He is a great and personable guy. You can count on him to have a good time whether you are running or not. He just annoys the junk out of you that he will PR and crush your time the night after drinking.
Questions for you:
Do you have any of these friends?
Do you consider yourself any of these people?
I am unfortunately the Injury Connaiseur. You name it, I’ve had it. The worst has been plantar fasciitis, multiple stress fractures (including my pelvis which took over 2 years to heal), and a mystery knee/quad thing that even the doctor couldn’t figure out. I have several friends and relatives that look to me for running advice. I always say I can tell them what NOT to do! I know several Push the Pace Pats. They run the same distance, same speed, usually only on a treadmill, and then wonder why they don’t PR come race day. Drives me nuts!
Love this, very funny and insightful. Can I be a couple of these at the same time?
You are allowed to be all of them at the same time! 😉
I have ALL of these friends. I wonder which one they think I am…
Hahaha!!! You are so right on with this! I love it. I also have the friend who breaks down every possible analytic post-race. We call her Analysis Ann and we love her and anxiously await her “race report” after each one 🙂
I think that these days I am the injury connaiseur, although I don’t try to give too much advice since I clearly haven’t figured things out for myself…..but 10 years ago I was hungover harry. In college my friends did not understand how I would always go running to get rid of a hangover.
I’m probably a little of all 5. Love my watch, get some sort of an injury. Usually run as fast as I can, or run with slower people and talk their ear off. Not an Ultra guy, but I do have a beard.
I often have a few beers the night before a race, but drink most of my beer after the race.
I think I know someone who fits most of these profiles.
This is the weirdest thing but I’m pretty sure I know the owner of that car with the stickers and it’s a guy named Drew who used to live in Greenville. Saw his sticker car at a race once and heard he since got a new car but just put more stickers on it.
Oh and I love “Push the Pace Pat” because I have a friend named Pat and last night at the brew run… he was pushing the pace to try to keep up with me and another friend. I don’t really know that I consider myself any of those things but if anything I am definitely a numbers nerd… analytical Amy ;).
Ha, I wish I was life of the party but sadly I’m Injured Runner. The Push the Pace meme made my day!
The moment I saw that meme I knew it was perfect for this post. I’m glad you enjoyed the same sense of humor.
Yep, I know every single one of these guys! I’m most like Ultramarathoner Unice and I often see Hungover Harriet (the female version) speeding past me at races chatting about how much wine she had last night. It kinda makes me want to drink more! Maybe she no longer feels the pain barrier?!
I’m the Injury Connoisseur AND Push the Pace Pat.
Hm. I wonder if those two things could possibly be related? 😛
But for real, my training plan for my first half marathon was ‘run around the popular park path and not let anyone pass me. Especially not anyone wearing Vibrams.’ I actually did fine in the race, but I’ve had multiple stress fractures and tendon injuries since, so it’s the only half marathon I’ve been able to run!
I really admire you, Holly, for your patience in performing real, solid, slow base-building miles. My stupid ego has such a hard time with self-perceived slow paces, but even though you train much slower than I do, you race faster!
I definitely think they could be related. When I first running, I would push the pace a lot and it would only result in me getting injured! I actually got my first seriously running injury that way (tibial stress fracture!)
By the way, I’m so sorry I spelled your name wrong! It just came out with a ‘y’ instead of an ‘ie.’ But yes, you’re actually one of my inspirations to slow down my training runs after I come back from my current sfx, so thanks for your honest blogging and for not being one of those to routinely race your training.
Hahaha these are great. I’m the injury prone one… sadly. I can pretty much think of one of my running friends that fits every one of these categories though!
I instantly thought of a friend or someone I know for every one of these types. Except for the Injury Connoisseur, because that one is me. D:
It seems like a lot of people are injury prone! 🙁
I’m the injured runner. But I did finish nerve injections and pt on Tuesday! Until the next injury comes along that is.
This post is fantastic 🙂 Unfortunately I’m definitely The Injury Connoisseur. I really wish my body co-operated with my mind so I could be more like Ultramarathoner Unice, but…nope.
I think I know of one most of these colourful characters…I would definitely trade being The Injury Connoisseur for any of the other types though! Which one would you say you were?
Hahaha I know these people!
This is great!!! I love it! You should make a category for the runner who obsesses over things Cuz that would be me.
I’m the “Oh shoot the 5k is next week? I should have trained” person 😛
Hmm… I don’t know where I fit… 🙂
This is very apt!
Hahaha I’m not really a runner but I have lots of runner friends and I can definitely think of people who fall into these categories!! Haha
I don’t really fit in any of these categories. I used to be the single pace person (just not fast) until I learned about the 80/20 principle and changed my running. I also don’t have many friends who run so that kind of keeps me sane. I think I’m more of an opposites attract kind of person. My best friend is a computer whiz
Injured > This girl. hahaha. I don’t really know any ultramarathoners O.o But otherwise, yeap… I know one from each. Haha.
Ahaha I don’t agree with the beardy ultra marathoner though. There is also a very special specie of ultra hungover harry who crushes you on a 50 miler even though he went to the bar the day before.
I always thought most ultra marathoners loved their beards. So stereotypical…that is awesome though you can run like that! I could not even imagine.
Nope, I don’t fit into any of these categories. I think the car with the stickers is great- even better if they’re sarcastic stickers. That takes real commitment.
Oh, boy…I’m definitely Unice! Thank god I don’t have a beard, however…yet! Great post, Hollie!
OMG, I love this! And you used actual names of my coworkers/friends! One of my BFFs Unice ran 30 miles on Christmas Day–just because.
I get such a kick out of this blog post
… unfortunately i feel like i relate best to the hung over runner. Hung over running is simply the best way to conquer a night of drinking… Move around, get some fresh air… Can’t beat it!
Hahahaha oh my gosh, this is amazing!
I’ve definitely got Ultra Unice, and Hungover Harry! They both amaze me, I could never pull off what either of them do!
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