Staying Flexible

The moment I got into the NYCM my life became pure chaos.  About a week after signing up for the marathon I decided I would work for the summer in VA then move to Texas with Tim in the fall.  He was graduating around that time and it made sense it would be a good time frame.  When I made that decision in May I thought I would have the summer to train for the marathon and keep that training in the fall while living down in Texas.  Since moving down here only two weeks ago, life has thrown me a lot of curve balls. 

Somewhere in college I lost the ability to be flexible.  I think it was the day I signed up for the cross country team while already being on our collegiate swim team.  (Looking back I think why was this a good idea?) Between college work, classes, running and swimming I needed to be in a routine to get everything done in the day.  I knew what I needed to do and when .  I also knew I needed to have life planned out a few days prior to accomplish these tasks.  That worked out well for me throughout school and I was able to thrive in everything I set out to do.  It worked out well solely because I had no one elses schedule to work around.  It was just me.  After making a lot of life decisions senior year I stayed pretty routine to finish my new major on time while still running.  Even on days that I didn’t have class until noon I liked to wake up around 7 and do homework in the morning.

When I got a job in Oswego I kept a planned routine.  I essentially had been living by myself and on my own schedule for three years and just needed to worry about myself.  Now living with Tim I’ve already learned very quickly you can’t plan or make plans based upon yourself and you have to be flexible.

For instance Tim doesn’t always get done with work until around 6, 7 or even 8.  He also doesn’t know when he will get done and can’t text and say I’ll be done at such and such time.  So I have to be flexible of when I’m eating or making dinner.  Maybe he will show up at 5…maybe 8.  Both have happened on numerous occasions.

We also thought we would be moving again at the earliest in January.  That isn’t in the cards for us and we will have to be in New Jersey by early November.  That is only a month and a half away. I just unpacked and moved to Texas and now I have to repack and move to New Jersey.   There was little or no warning and he just came home and said “hey check this out”.  Oh these are our move dates.

Incase you forgot I’m also running the New York City Marathon the first weekend in November.  So I have that bit of stress to go along with moving and training.  Moving, training, looking for a job was not all part of my plan and routine when graduating college but it’s what happened.

So over the course of the week I learned that I will have to move again BEFORE the marathon on November 3rd.  I have to repack everything and due to some training Tim is doing be in New Jersey before he gets there.  We were not expecting this at all.  Would I have moved to Texas if this was the case?  I don’t know but no sense in playing the what if game.  I don’t regret it.  I am enjoying my refound spontaneous and flexible attitude.

Being flexible is something I have come to embrace again in the last few weeks.  I thought I could live my life on a set routine but moving down here has taught me that is not the case at all.  I am glad to have found a spontaneous happy medium.  I don’t fear the future like I once did I am embracing it.  Things will happen when they happen.  I will find a job when I move to NJ and worrying about it now isn’t going to do me any good.  As much as I would love to preach this to others I know it is something they must find on their own, just as I did.

Question for you: Are you spontaneous or a routine oriented person? 

23 Comments

  1. I am very much a routine kind of person. Plus it’s just easier when you have kids. My kids thrive on a routine. I am a bit flexible though because sometimes life throws huge curveballs!!

    I hope everything goes smoothly for you 🙂

  2. You have such a great attitude about this all, it must be really stressful. But the light at the end of the tunnel is being closer to a bunch of NJ & NYC runners, right?! 😉 I’m definitely a planner… I am obsessed with calendars and planners and like to lock-in plans as far in advance as I can. But, I’m okay with things that pop up spontaneously, I just don’t really like plans that change last minute (but I’ve learned to deal).

  3. I feel like your summer has been determined by a spinning wheel basically. It like hmmm what should we make Hollie do today, lets spin the wheel! You seem to be projecting pretty happy vibes though so kudos to you!!

    I like routines but it’s tough to do that with a significant other. I would say my 7 – 5 is pretty planned out but other than that I will go with the flow for the most part! I went to a concert last night, WOAH week night activities.

  4. I am so much of a planner it has become detrimental. I want to have everything, and I mean EVERYTHING planned out. It is wrecking havoc on my relationship with Tyler and my mental sanity.
    I need to be more spontaneous. I’ve always wanted to move South…. maybe someday I’ll grow the pair I need to do it =)

  5. I am such a routine person, Jeff often gets mad at me about this. I have zero ability to relax thanks to my need to stick to a routine, but it is something I am working on and I actually have made huge improvements to be more flexible in my day to day life.

  6. I’m pretty sure that the only way to break out of the routine-oriented, stress-about-the-future mindset is to literally be thrown into situations where you HAVE to give up that control – it forces you to face the fear and see that the world doesn’t end if things don’t go according to plan. I still like my routines, but I’m definitely a lot more comfortable with flexibility… I think travelling a lot is what does it for me. I fall into routine pretty quick when I’m at home (especially since I live alone), but I kind of have to let go of all of that when I travel, so it’s a good balance.

  7. I definitely had a set schedule every day and still have pretty much my entire day planned out ahead of time. I’ve learned to be flexible, though, when spontaneous hospital trips came every once and a while. You can’t live life on a complete schedule because it not only gets boring, it’s somewhat dangerous. I mean, honestly, if someone watched me every day they would know almost what I were doing at the exact hour. It’s definitely something you have to learn for yourself, though. You’re absolutely right.

    PS. I thought this post was going to be about stretching because it said flexible. LOL

  8. I’m definitely a routine person. I thrive off schedules and knowing exactly what I have to do or where I have to be at what time. It’s challenging to be spontaneous or do anything spur of the moment, even though it’s important to be flexible. I guess when it comes to working and training, I need a schedule and routine, but I do relax and go with the flow more when I’m hanging out with friends.

  9. I love your attitude regarding this! Maybe one day I’ll get there, but as of now I am such a routine, set-in-my-ways kind of person. It works out fine for me right now because I’m single and live alone but I often wonder what will happen in the future if I move in with someone. Definitely need to work on my flexibility.
    Have a great weekend!

  10. Definitely an effort to be flexible.

    Holly,
    Re: the marathon, I’m having difficult in figuring out when to train RMTs. They do so much good in the long run but for me, it tends to hurt the next day as they go really deep into their tissue massage. Do you generally get your scheduled the day after a 20mi? Also, are you planning to peak at 22mi or beyond? A lot of the programs tend to peak at 20mi but I think I read on your blog earlier that you wanted to do more than that. What weekend are you doing that for? And last question (I promise!) will you be listening to music or anything during your marathon?

    1. I’m not sure what you mean by RMTs?

      I honestly just get deep tissue massages when I feel like my body can use them. I thought I wanted to do 20+ but I’m not actually sure yet. I know I’ll do at least 2 more 20 milers though. As far as music I don’t think I’ll be listening. I had thought about that too but I generally don’t race with music and would have to download an entire playlist. ha!

      You can ask me as many questions as you would like. 🙂

      1. Oops, I think of RMTs and deep tissue massage as being synonymous. But you answered the q! Thanks!

  11. I am most definitely not as flexible as most people. but since having a BF that works in pharmacy across the sea I’ve been trying to learn to be!

  12. I’m flexible BUT I have my own routine. I can quickly arrange things the best I can but with a full and part time job, I need to plan my own running and making time with my guy so planning is a must. He is not a planner. I do my best to force him to plan. Sometimes it works, sometimes not but.. Whatcha gonna do?

  13. you are the queen of flexibility lately but I have learned that i actually am more balanced when I don’t keep close to this rigid schedule, when I actually veer off. I am so happy you have found this point too

  14. I like to be spontaneous at times, but generally, I prefer the routine of knowing how the day is going to flow and getting myself organised beforehand. Just after I finished uni I ended up moving five times in a year so I know how disruptive a move can be! I hope all goes well for you. 🙂

  15. I am really happy you are finding this flexibility girl, I think research forcing it upon me in school is probably one of the best things that ever happened to me. It has allowed me to set priorities on a daily basis and to keep mostly calm when things change or go wrong. Routine is awesome, but it will only get you so far!

Comments are closed.