In between all of my moves I was left with not having a job for roughly 8 months. At first I enjoyed being able to lounge around. That enjoyment lasted about one week and then I began to get extremely bored. While I didn’t have a job I was actively looking. That being said, you can only look for jobs so much during the day.
Some people have mentioned that looking for a job was like a full time job. For me I probably spent 4 hours or so actively looking most days. Some days (especially in Texas) there were no new jobs to look for, apply for, etc. That meant it was far less.
Now that I’m actually working and out of the house around 45 hours a week (with commuting), I’ve found myself really taking advantage of my days off.
Case and point: Last week I had to use my day off to go to the DMV. The last thing I wanted to do was take one of my few days off, drive to the DMV for a few hours only to sit, wait and then do what I needed to do. That’s adulthood though and I had to get the necessary paperwork done.
I’ve found myself stuck in the same rut or routine several times wondering…does it get better? Will I be happier with x,y,z? I must rush here, I must rush there, I must get everything done. In college, I tended to have the all or nothing mentality. I wanted to do it all and I wanted to do it all well. I would like to dabble in swimming, in running, double major, join clubs, have a job…etc. I wanted to do it all. I wanted to be successful in everything I did.
The truth is that you cannot be successful in multiple things by burning the candle at both ends. If you stress yourself out trying to fit every single thing you can into your life, it won’t add quality of life but rather take it away.
I first learned that when I quit swim team my senior year of college. I no longer had a 2-3 hour commitment daily to the pool. I had 2-3 hours to work on my studies, to relax and to focus on other things. I wasn’t rushed anymore and it honestly was the first (of many) lessons I learned. You don’t need to be amazing at everything. You don’t need to do everything.
I second time I learned that was in Oswego. While Tim and I did long distance, I only really focused on working, running and hanging out occasionally with friends. I didn’t have a lot of outside factors and it allowed me to excel at working and meet many new people (I was injured at running but did go to the gym). If I had more things piled on top, I don’t think I would have gotten nearly the benefits (and enjoyment) of what I did out of my job in Oswego.
The next time I truly learned this lesson was moving in with Tim last August. Though I never speak finances on the blog, I had saved enough in my savings to live one year without having a job. Not one year buying everything in the world but one year living comfortably. (This means doing the occasional road race, new shoes but also paying what needs to be payed like bills etc). I knew I probably wouldn’t find a job for a few months (a few not 8) so I had financially prepared for that.
While sitting and applying for jobs I felt the need to apply for every single job available. Nevermind that it didn’t look interesting, it was an hour away…I qualified so I would apply. I even found myself thinking if I got one job, should I get two?
All of that was unnecessary. I found a job I love and I’m happy. The wait was worth it and it allows me the balance I need in my life. In the end I am sitting here saying you don’t need to do everything. You don’t need to thrive on being on the go all the time. If you are anything like me (you may or may not be) then you do need and truly deserve some rest and down time for yourself. This is a lesson I struggle with often.
Question for you:
Do you have the all or nothing mentality?
I used to in college but have found that I do really enjoy my down time too.