Opening Up About My Injury Part 2

If you missed part 1

After my doctor called me with the news of my fracture, I continued on the elliptical.  I didn’t know whether to cry…whether to be relieved that I had a diagnosis and wasn’t a mystery…I was just in a state of shock.  I ended up being in the gym for a total of 2 hours, in my own world.  I was on the elliptical with my headphones in, no music playing, no TV on and just facing a wall zoned out. 

Seeing anyone and talking to anyone was not what I wanted. 

I went back home and just had a meltdown.  I cried the entire night. I layed in my bed moping and I will never be ashamed of that.  I felt like I had worked so hard for nothing.  Nothing at all.  Sure I had PRed along the way but I knew I was capable of so much more. Though I knew none of that mattered anymore because this was not something I wanted to run through.  Could I run through it?

I questioned that…I had run ten milers and not realized my foot was broken.  It just felt like a bruise.  I had run two cross country races and placed well and posted great times and just thought I had a mild case of plantar fasciitis.

I could treat plantar fasciitis aggressively and then just take a month or two off after season to find myself and realize life after college running.   

No, I was not going to bring myself to do that.  I ran five miles the day after finding out it was broken.

Five miles (and didn’t injure myself anymore then I was) and decided it wasn’t worth it to me to run through.  It was enough pain that I would probably be taking IBP every time I ran a race.  Not every time I ran, but every time I ran a raced or did tempo work.   I would be miserable running and if I wasn’t racing at my best…was it worth it?

The following Monday I had a doctor’s appointment to figure everything else out.  There wasn’t a need to cast it because it wasn’t a Jones fracture, it was perfectly in line and just had to calcify back over.  So if that was okay, then how would we treat this “plantar fasciitis”?

You don’t have plantar fasciitis was the first thing my doctor said.  There is a reason it’s not going away with treatment for plantar fasciitis.  My first response was typical: Who, what, when, where, why, HOW did this happen?

 How did this cyst lodge itself above my fascia, which in turn created a tight fascia in turn breaking my bone?  How does that even happen?  

Do you know his response?  What probably irritated me the most of anything.

Well you see Hollie, you had the luck that your blood clotted in your foot…it could have clotted in your arm…in your your brain but it chose your foot.

Oh so you mean I could have had a cyst anywhere in my body and it was just BAD FREAKING LUCK that it was in my heel? 

Awesome..great…thanks body…so much for that. 

The treatment for this though was much more aggressive.  Since there was a full layer of muscle between my skin and foot, they couldn’t just drain the cyst.  They couldn’t just remove it.  My entire plantar fascia would have to be cut for that to be removed at its state.  (That would mean not running for 1-2 years!).

Treating the cyst became the number one concern because it could rebreak more bones in my foot and the first break would just heal naturally.  I immediately went on anti-inflammatory meds that made my body hold in 10 pounds of water.  Not exaggerating in the slightest, for the month I was on the meds, I could not fit into my pants.

The month of September went by and I finally was able to go off the meds.  Not much had changed with my body and cyst minus I was not bloated anymore.  My bone was on the way to heal so that was glorious but my cyst…my cyst was bigger than before.   So I got a muscle scrape which helped temporarily.  For about a week, I thought I was healed.

But the cyst quickly grew back to its normal size within a week.  I continued stretching, foam rolling and everything but nothing was working.  I was pretty positive that I would have to get my fascia cut and take a year or two off of running.  I was also in a state of depression. Not knowing if your injury is going to ever heal is far worse than knowing you need to wait X number of months to heal.

My doctor recommended a cortisone shot and I decided within five minutes I guess I could suck it up and get it.  Never have I been in so much pain in my life.  The shot itself was given to me in the arch of my foot.  My arch was frozen and then he stuck the cortisone in there.  I didn’t feel the needle go in but when the needle hit the fascia, I have never been in so much pain in my life.  I didn’t know whether to cry or what to do.

The following few days I was in more pain than ever before.  I couldn’t walk, I couldn’t go to the gym…I couldn’t do anything.  I had pretty much thought that running in the next year was out of the question since I couldn’t walk without crutches.  The doctor had said that it would either cure me within 72 hours or it would go back to how it was.  He did not say it would ever get worse.

And that is what it did.   My foot was so swollen you could physically see something was in there that did not belong.  So I had the exact opposite of what cortisone was supposed to do, it had in fact inflamed with fascia more than before.

Stay tuned for the final part…sometime soon.