I must learn to save my work. I could have like twenty blogs posted daily if I did. You see blogging besties-quick tangent before I get to my main point. I tend to write blogs in Microsoft word and then rely on autosave when my computer crashes and/or I end up restarting my computer.
They only save about half the time. Rude. Well this blog isn’t about my lack of common sense. Not really anyways.
—————
Here is my warning to you. This is kind of a novel of a post. Think lifestylesc. I don’t apologize because I enjoy rambling away.
I have gotten a lot of questions in the last few months about my personal life regarding my last relationship and honestly I was not quite ready to do a blog about it. We are not still dating and haven’t been for a while…
—————–
It all started when I went to college. I wasn’t looking for a boyfriend. I mean god knows they weren’t looking for me either. For the first month and a half, my roommate Kierstin and I hung out. We became extremely close and had some of the best times the first month of my freshman year. We were so carefree.
We did everything together with the exception of classes. We even swam a few laps before swim season started. If you have read my blog for a while you know I didn’t choose my school to swim. I didn’t choose it for athletics and I wasn’t planning on doing swimming-let alone running but that is another story. Kierstin and I mostly stuck to ourselves until the first day of swim practice. She had convinced me since I swam in high school that I should go tryout for the college team.
I was not in the mood to swim at all but honestly, I didn’t want to end up having no friends if she was going to be busy with that so I decided I would swim. I also enjoy structured wokouts and if I hated it then I would quit…nothing to lose. Well I tried out for the team and I made it.
Not more than two weeks into practice, we had both made lots of friends and I knew the entire male and female teams. About a month into practice, one of the males (whom it’s really not hard to figure out since I have dated a whopping 1 person throughout college…but I won’t use names) started talking to me more than others. He would talk to me outside of swim practice when we randomly saw each other on campus or we had lunch a few times.
When he asked me out on a date, I had no idea we were going on a legit date. To this day-I fully believe I am the most naïve and clueless college female in the world. Also the most socially awkward but you know how that is. Ha-when I told Kierstin that we were going out to eat, she was like on a date?
I literally said oh no he just wants to be friends and get to know some of the team. In my mind, I also fully believed that. BAHAHA. True life.
Long story short, we ended up dating in early November of my freshman year (and his junior).
Freshman year went by pretty smoothly. At the end of the spring semester we continued dating, even though we were now 600+ miles apart. I lived in Southern VA-he lived in Northern NY. It actually wasn’t the hardest and most difficult thing in the world. We were both really busy so it worked well.
Sophomore year was a bit of a blur for me. I was finally regaining some of my speed back in swimming which I hadn’t had since high school. I ended up swimming almost exclusively with the guys team. That was all fine and dandy but I was a distance swimmer and so was the boyfriend. I am not a happy athlete at all. I have a temper that god knows you don’t want to light. I was stuck swimming in lane with him and two other guys and lets just say…our practice ethics were not the same…
So my days ended up being something along the lines of eating breakfast and dinner with him, swimming anywhere from 2-4 hours in the same lane and possibly chilling if we didn’t have too much work. That is a lot of time. During peak training on winter break, think 4 hours of swimming and no classes. It become to the point when it was a too much time.
But sophomore year was a good year too and the summer went by quickly again. Since he transferred he had to take an extra semester and it was nice because I had someone there for me when I started running and swimming.
I was so busy the first semester of this year. If you read my blog you pretty much know that. He kept me in check and allowed me to have time outside of running, swimming and school. I had such a good first semester. I had a ton of fun and I still think my favorite night was swimming formal but ha…that is another story. Maybe I just miss my black hair I don’t know.
We were slowly growing apart though. Little things would disrupt us and lead into little fights. Long story short, there was no fuse that lit us we just fizzled out. We were going our separate ways and it was better for both us. I don’t ever bash relationships and I don’t regret ours. It was a great chapter in my life but I’m on a new one now.
Right now I’m not looking for anyone. I’m not going out of my way to find myself a million men. I feel just as previously when the wind blows me in the right direction then it will happen and until then I’ll jam to Beyonce’s single ladies.
Question for you:
Talk to me about your relationship life.
Oh wowww thanks for sharing that Hollie! I’m glad to know that you’re just moving on! Hmmmm well, our story is long but beautiful. 😀 I am engaged and I know that God has brought us two together. We’ve gone through many obstacles (not towards one another), but getting through together without having anyone break us up! We’re of different ages and ethnicity, and so things were very tough with outside influences. God has brought us really far and I’m ever so grateful for someone who first of all, loves the Lord like I do, and everything falls into place because of that. I think we both really try hard in communicating whatever is going on in our hearts and minds, and that is always sooo helpful. Haha! This is everything in one little nutshell. Have a wonderful day you beautiful girl!
Love this story… sometimes no matter how long or what the circumstances it just doesnt work. that’s life.
I’m single. Have been since last summer. I DID date int eh fall/winter, but totally just gave up in february. I had enough and wanted to focus on me. It was nice… but now I feel like once prep is over, I want an icecream date! ahha
We are so twinnies. True life. I am focusing on me right now and actually getting to be exactly where I want too in life.
Love you. Right now I am seriously complicated and conflicted. Maybe I will e-mail you / text you..I guess I just don’t want the whole world to see it 🙂
Thanks for sharing girl. This is hard stuff to talk about sometimes but I think its better to open up and let it out then keep it bottled up. 🙂
Hollie you have such a good attitude about relationships — it was a chapter in your life and now you’re moving on.
My relationship life — yikes. I had one boyfriend in 8th grade for 2 weeks. Another one during my freshman year for a few weeks — then he started dating a junior and dumped me. And then I finally met Jason when I was 23 and we dated for 5 months, got engaged and got married 5 months later. Yes he was basically my real first boyfriend and that is ok with me — actually I wouldn’t have it any other way. I only wish I had met him earlier than age 23!
Awe that is incredible Holly! You two are so lovely together as well. 🙂
My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 7 years now! It has been fun to grow up together and share lots of memories:)
I loved how open you were with this. I enjoyed reading it.
Here’s my relationship life: ______________________________________
Never had a boyfriend. There ya go. I fail.
mgil. I dated one boy in high school and he was a toolbag. All of them are.
Thank you for sharing your story :). Sometimes it’s good to enjoy the single life!
Oh my love life could not be more complicated. My boyfriend of four years and I just recently broke up, and it was basically the same thing as you and your swimmer boy. We just drifted apart. I still love him, but I think that sometimes you stay with someone out of comfort and not because you love them. We’ll see what happens. Regardless, I’m leaving in two months to move 1,000 miles away. Who know what the future holds or us
Wow are we in the same shoes! I hope everything goes well for ya Sara. 🙂
Thanks for sharing Hollie! I’m glad you are’t on the prowl because when girls prowl for guys, it is never good LOLZ. My relationship life is good.. except I hardly see my boy boy.
Oh my god. True life. I will not prowling for any man lolz. EVER.
Love this. You have such a great attitude about it given everything that has happened. I agree, go with the flow because when the time is right you will find the right person…at least that’s what happened to me.
Let’s not even get into detail about my love life before Mike. The expression “You live, you learn” is totally true, and while I don’t regret it, I don’t dream about it everyday either. Let’s just say I am a happy camper now.
Thanks for sharing your story!
you are so nonchalant about it. I love that. No need to stir up drama over something that wasn’t actually that big of a deal. People change and that’s how life is.
My love life is nonexistant. My last date was like two months ago, but then the guy started getting kind of creepy so I stopped talking to him for the summer. I kind of feel bad because I led him on but he just said too much one time and I was like just like nooope.
Nice post Hollie- Feels good to share things like that and I can tell you’ve learned and grown so much from the entire experience! Have a great Friday!
Hey pretty lady, thank you for sharing your personal story on this matter! I love that you are so nonchalant about it like Tara said… there is no reason to get hung up on such a matter. Going with the flow is certainly the way to live
I was wondering about him..I won’t name names either 🙂
I hadn’t seen him on here for a while & was going to ask you what was going on, but I didn’t want to be intrusive.
So glad you shared. Loved hearing your story…and most of all I love what you said- that’s you DON’T bash relationships. You are awesome! That is so hard to remember sometimes..and you said it perfectly!
Im pretty sure you know all mine! haha
Being single can actually be a great opportunity (at least that is h ow I looked at it the past 6 months)
Non-exsistent…:( I sooo wish I would have been more outgoing in college. I ran xc and it consumed me. I was too tired or occupied to do too much outside of school and practice. I went to a Christian Baptist College and was surrounded by men I would have loved to marry. But, I’m a loner and rather be alone, with my girlfriends, or running. College was the best time of my life and I wish I would have realized how fast and precious those times were. 🙂
I have to say I am more of a basher, ha ha. My college boyfriend turned hubby had low self-esteem (never shared that with me, along with lots of shocking things I never knew about him, ie his closest brother died as a child) and cheated on us (me & his vows) and then dumped me on the day of our 2nd anniversary (what you were expecting to go out tonight? Nope, I’m going out with my girlfriend). I was in total shock for a year. I lost weight (no appetite, I remember once not being able to eat a whole apple) never used a coat the whole first winter (yeah I live in CA, but we do have some cold-ish weather sometimes. I mean others were wearing coats, but I didn’t need one. Makes me wonder what else can we do with our minds?), I was really & truly physically numb. Now mentally, there was much sadness & depression (only recognized later with hindsight, ‘cuz I thot I was fine at the time!).
Two significant relationships (not much to say but significant hurt and pain again) and then I married my current and we had a child which changed our relationship from almost totally in sync to my pastor saying (in counseling) you guys are diametrically opposed about everything (he washed his hands of us, said we were hopeless and would not meet with us again!). We have lived apart for 7 years, with me trying (ok, truthfully, I’ve given up, but I did try a looong time ago) to make a divorce happen but I’m horrible at paperwork, and my 2nd lawyer doesn’t care unless he is paid big bucks (a 5 min phone call is about 20 bucks, I never call him). However, last week I started toying with the idea of starting a special savings account, “divorce fund”, so I can get this albatross from around my neck (250 an hour makes me feel sick). I guess I’ll call and ask him to estimate how much $ I need to have, and then try to do the financial paperwork required. Oh how I wish he could just do it all, but no, I have to do financial paperwork which I haven’t been able to complete in 7 years, yet.
I hang out with friends sometimes and mostly spend a lot of time by myself (I get along well, ha ha ha, with me). Certainly not in the market for romance, especially without divorce papers! argh!
I got sidetracked above, with my own bad romance, but I want to say thanks for sharing, I definitely was one of the wondering ones.
my relationship life is less than exciting and more drama filled and confusing than ever. i could easily share the long story over an hour long tea or coffee but then again im not sure if that would even be enough time haha. its so draining too! haha xo
Thanks for sharing. Enjoy the single life for as long as you can! When you aren’t looking, you’ll end up meeting someone special!
Thanks for sharing your story…I love your attitude towards it all and am glad you’re moving on but not moving on to someone else right away.
I’ve been single since October when my boyfriend of 2+ years ended it over some stuff from my past and the fact his parents never liked me after a certain point early on in our relationship even though they acted like they liked me to my face. I’m still trying to find my footing in this world now after high school without that guy. He had become my best friend and I lost touch with the girls from high school (not because of that guy) so now I’m starting all over, pretty much alone and learning how to make friends in the adult world. Because I go to school at home everyone knows everyone at the colelge I go to so it’s hard to meet people at school (in my opinion). So yea…that’s why I have all you blogger friends haha!