I have been wanting to write this post for a while now but the words haven’t flowed as I would like. The fact of the matter is it’s covered in several blogs daily. Don’t compare yourself to others. Every person is different. Ect, ect. As with all of those phrases “the comparison trap” is also overused.
But what about comparing yourself to yourself? What about negative self talk that eats away into our heads every day? If you are human you have had negative self talk. You have doubted your abilities, looks, or anything in your life. It has stressed you out. It has put you down. It happens to everyone at some point and we all have had that experience. For me personally I have a lot of negative self talk right now about job searching but this isn’t what this post is about.
What I did want to talk about was negative self talk about physical appearance.
It’s not a secret that #selfies have ruled the instagram world for a while. Personally I don’t mind selfies as long as every photo is not a selfie and they are not half naked. If you want to take a million selfies…go for it, but please keep your clothes on.
When you see others photos it’s hard not to compare yourself to them. X has great bangs and a gorgeous complexion. Y has the most beautiful and popping eyes I’ve ever seen. Z has the world’s perfect body. I could scroll down my instagram, facebook or twitter and find something I’m jealous about with every single person.
But did you ever stop to think how many photos you take before finding the perfect photo to post? Unlike the real world, you have a plethora of choices. If you truly wanted to take 1000 photos to find the perfect one for instagram you could and no one would know if you took 1 or 1000. In the real world, people see you at your best, worst and everything in between. Generally that is not the case online.
When choosing a photo for a blog someone is not going to chose the worst looking photo of them. Why would you choose a photo that you are blinking and therefore look half intoxicated? You wouldn’t. The photo that is being showcased is generally the best one.
So are we comparing ourselves to the best looking photo that captures a perfect angle of someone? Maybe. I don’t even care to dig into photos that are being photoshopped as well. Generally a photo on a blog or instagram is the best of the best. The cream of the crop. For all you noninstagrammers and bloggers, the “facebook profile shot”.
So where am I going with this?
First and foremost, the point is stop comparing yourself to other people. Whether you are a blogger or not , stop looking at people’s profile photos, instagram or blogging photos and comparing. Realize (and I’ll fully admit I’ve retaken plenty of photos to get the “perfect” one) that you don’t know the angle or amount of photoshop that might have gone into that single photo. Unless you are with this person every time of the day, you really have absolutely no idea.
Realize that every person in the entire world has good and bad days. When I wear makeup I am a different person versus right now bumming around half showered and looking a mess. I won’t deny that I like to wear makeup and it makes me feel good. I don’t wear it all the time and especially now that my life has consisted of being a bum and being a bum. Would I feel the best taking a glamorous photoshoot right now? No. Not at all.
Here is a photo of me taken last January.
And here is a photo of me now after typing this post.
One I would send my grandparents to give them a yearly update…one I would probably not post (or detag myself on facebook). But in reality it doesn’t matter. In a society that does judge people on the outside, in reality we are own toughest critics.
Questions for you:
Fan of selfies? Do you care?
No, not really. People taking selfies does not ruin my day.
What feature (of yourself) are you most proud of?